However, I noticed that the questions keep coming so I feel that I need to address them.
Once I found out that Bristol would be one of the cast members on “Dancing with the Stars” I was honestly somewhat shocked and a little disgusted. How can Levi and our family see Tripp while she is away in LA practicing her dance routines? That was my first concern. It has been months since I last saw my precious nephew and now it is clear that it will be many more months before I see him again.
Along with my constant concern for my nephew, what really bothered me, with all due respect to other teen mothers out there, is that I believe this is sending the WRONG message to other teens.
They’re going to look at this as, Bristol Palin got pregnant as a teen, and now she is famous! They will see her being offered multiple opportunities, being cast on a sitcom, joining the cast of “Dancing with the Stars”, all while making hundreds of thousands of dollars. For many teens it will appear that the road to success is through unprotected sex.
I really hope that the media will realize that this kind of thing is sending the message to other young teens that this is glamorous and a way to get a lot of attention. Since Bristol became pregnant, and made headlines world wide, teen pregnancy in Wasilla has sky rocketed!
Everywhere I look I see somebody who is expecting a new baby. If you go into a public restroom there is writing on the walls saying:
“Is it bad that I’m 15 and want a baby soooo bad?”
“I would give anything to have a baby!”
“I want to be a mommy at 14!”
And many other extremely disturbing and jaw dropping messages. I think that having Bristol on television dancing along with those other so-called celebrities is just going to reinforce the idea in the minds of many teens that having a baby can make you glamorous and famous, and you will get tons of attention. Which of course is absolutely ridiculous! Yet many of these girls are just screaming for attention and believe this is a way to get it.
After I read those messages on the restroom wall, I actually took a picture of them with my cell phone because I was so completely shocked by how many young girls are writing them. It seems that it is becoming a trend!
I showed my dad the pictures, and at first he was wondering why in the world I took a picture of the bathroom wall, but when I explained to him how many teens are TRYING to get pregnant in response to all of the attention, money, and fame that Bristol was receiving, he shook his head in disgust.
He just looked at me and we both immediately knew what the other was thinking. How sad these young girl’s lives must be for them to believe that becoming pregnant was their only hope of finding love and getting attention from those around them. I wish I could reach out to these young girls and explain to them that they have their whole lives ahead of them, and there are other ways to get attention without going out and sleeping around just to receive gifts at a baby shower, have people comment on your belly, and buy cute baby clothes.
I just don’t think many of them realize how many responsibilities come with a new baby, and that parenting is essentially a full time job that lasts the rest of your life.
I think that as a speaker for the Candie’s Foundation, and advocate for abstinence, that Bristol should be spreading a message that speaks to the difficulties of motherhood, and pounding home the idea that, yes she is now famous for being a teen mom, but THAT it is not the right decision for the majority of the teenage girls out there.
She should talk about just how hard it is to manage a “full time job and college” while being a “single mother”. Instead I believe she is focused on the opportunity to wear fancy gowns and jewelry, and appear fabulous on TV. Not exactly an opportunity offered to other single teenage mothers in this country.
I do hope she does well on the show, and I sincerely mean that! However for purely selfish reasons I hope she gets to come home sooner, rather than later, so that I can hopefully hold my nephew in my arms before too much time goes by.
Here is just some of the bathroom graffiti I have seen in Wasilla.
47 comments:
Mercede...this is a wonderful post! The Candies Foundation should have hired you as their spokeswoman, since you just said more in a couple of paragraphs than Bristol has in MONTHS, as a preventative measure to teens getting pregnant. Bravo, Mercede! Your mother did a good job raising you.
Bristol doesn't know what it's like to be a full time mom, working and going to school because she quit like her Mom. She and her family are NOT role models. They are ill-mannered hillbillies, the type who steal from an all you can eat buffet. I would not want any Palin kid in my family. They don't know a damn thing about love, respect or honor. They are all mooches, that will sell their own family for a discount. Stay away Mercedes!
You go Mercede..........thank you for posting the Grafitti. I am incredulous that young teens are focused on getting pregnant. These kids need help and they need it fast. I hope you send these pics to your local newspaper for publication. Do parents pick up the tab for their underage children's pregnancies and help raise the babies?
Bristol has had a dose of reality in ways we probably will never know regarding Tripp, Levi court testifying, etc. You can take Bristol out of Alaska but I don't know if she can handle being out of the protective bubble of silence she existed in the Palin compound.
Please let us hear from Sherry. A mother's perspective matters and maybe it is time she speaks out. BTW, you are doing a terrific job with your commentaries.
Mercedes, I and others would be interested in hearing more of what you understand about the responsiblities of becoming a parent. You have insight given your experience to assist, provide care and your mother's unique need of you due to her situation.
I had strong objections to the Harpers article for there were lies of ommission painting a false financial scenario that a teen earning ballpark entry level minimum wage can afford to buy real estate, furniture, automobiles etc. Such misinformation taken as fact by impressionable adolescents is harmful to them. Some ignorant people may think a famous teen mom is "remarkable", envy and admire someone for having it all simply by working as a clerk. Those of us plugged into reality of going wages in medical field recognize the bull put out there and that some may believe it is possible, be fooled of false information and pay dearly for the rest of their lives as will the babies. The greater consequence is higher percentages of young adults not graduating high school, trapped in low level wages, fostered dependancy on entitlement programs, taxpayer burdens, neglect, poor quality health care, resentment toward the infants that their birth did not provide the pipedream established by a so called role model.
A true and good role models is truthful to tell honestly about the childcare. Having a nanny or grandparents providing care ommitted portrays a false scenario to others.
Perhaps your town and others need an intervention program to teach accurate information so teens consider accurate consequences, responsiblities, accurate financial reality of what things cost.
Is that first one on a toilet seat??
Bristol is clueless. She is a ship without a rudder. So many dancers out there who have talent, who have put in long hours, and Bristol gets a chance on TV because??? She is SP's daughter. I don't think that anyone mistakes Bristol for a role model, but seeing one prominent teen mother makes it easier to follow the herd. moooo!
Wanting a baby at 14 is not unusual. Women are programmed to want to procreate. What we don't know at that age is that the body is pleading one thing while circumstances are totally different. We should be getting a hope chest and planning for the day we marry-- seriously. It gives us a place to put those energies.
I'd so seriously like to see you get in on some of the action not as a Bristol critic but as a person who has seen a lot. You are caring for your mom in sickness and incarceration, you are watching your brother go through his PRESENT train wreck of a life, working and keeping a life going for yourself. Who can relate to Bristol? She is a hanger on on her own mother's success and has nothing to say for herself.
Great post Mercede. And such a sad topic. The older I get the more I value what a wonderful childhood I had.
There was an article in Huffington Post recently, apropos of your sentiment, that said that perhaps Sarah Palin should be focusing on banning teen moms from appearing on DWTSs, rather than banning teens from having abortions w/o parental consent. I laughed at that one, but your post shows that the author has a very valid point; that allowing a 'famous' teen mom who is famous merely for having been pregnant during her mother's run for VP, to be on a show that pays LOTS of money is in effect REWARDING her for having gotten pregnant, thus encouraging other teens to get pregnant in an effort to be rewarded and lauded as well.
I can remember being 15 and thinking how neat it would be to be pregnant. Thankfully, it was just thoughts and musings at the time--I went on to college, got a job, bought a car, got an apartment, met a guy, got married, THEN we had the babies!! And it WAS neat to be pregnant. It was awesome, it was wonderful....and it was also the hardest times I've lived through--still living through. Being uncomfortable, being fearful and worried, planning everything ahead of time for the baby, suffering through a miscarriage, getting pregnant again and worrying once again.......the PAIN of labor, the awful tiredness afterwards, the joy of seeing yours and God's little creation, the love and the new frustrations between baby, mom, and husband.........it's just very overwhelming even for a grownup woman who is married and has a husband who helps around the house and with the kids!
Bristol is living in a fantasy world that is SO not the norm for most American teenage mothers.
Thank you for this message!
Thank you sooooo much.
Yes young girls-women do not understand the responsibility associated with unprotected sex. It seems getting preggo is a attention seeking tactic. Seeking attention is common, however it is how you do it, that makes one a whole
person.
Some people are never whole. They never get to a full circle behaving human. They just can't. Bristol speaks of no sex, yet is making a career off of pre marritial sex. There is a huge hole, a gap in her human being behavior. A big gap.
Anyway, if I saw those words on a bathroom wall frequented by young girls.... I'd pull out my sharpie and leave a little message of wisdom. But I'd degress, because it would be defacing someones private or even public property.
Hugs to you and mom !
Mercede, can you give us some statistics about the pregnancy explosion? What was the percentage of pregnant teens in 2007, 2008, and 2009? Well-chosen topic and nicely written.
My comment is where is Levi's lawyer. When you have visitation rights, and there not being enforced, he could take her to court. She is in violation of court order if he is not seeing his son.
I know people who can not move unless they get permission from the courts. A father has rights. Let me do some searching but there is an organization that helps fathers. Fathers usually get a bum rap. Get back to you on that.
Both Bristol and Levi got fame because of Sarah running for VP. If Sarah was not in politics,no one would care that Bristol was 17 & Levi 18 when she was pregnant. Sarah was asked at airport in DC Sat if she & Beck would run for office together. Sarah said they like what they are doing NOW. If Sarah does not run then interest in Bristol and Levi will fade. Levi and Bristol are making money now that I hope they use to support Tripp as I think the media will lose interest in both of them soon. Levi should be the one you should go to to see your nephew. Levi spends a lot of time in CA also. He should treat you to a nice trip there during the cold Alaskan winter.
Great job. Obviously more good role models AND good teachers are needed in Alaska. Great role models start at home. Parents, kids are looking up to you for guidance--show them the way. Don't let your community raise your kids.
Great post. Sad photos. People are lonely and unfulfilled. Kids are both expensive and precious, not a toy. Bristol Palin's choreographed hypocricy continues.... But I swear, that writing---it looks like what what educationally challenged Sarah Palin wouuld write on her paws.
Wow....perhaps those girls should learn to spell before they try their hand at motherhood.
Mercede - Levi must have agreed to let Bristol take Tripp out of state. Otherwise she is in violation of their custody agreement (by not providing Levi access to Tripp for his scheduled visits). If he did not agree to it, he needs to immediately notify the courts to let them know she is in violation of the agreement they both signed. However, my gut tells me he is ok with it for now, as he works on his own reality show.
as much as I'd love to blame Bristol and/or Sarah Palin ... this is 100% MEDIA's fault, IMO.
People magazine should be sued for portraying Bristol's life as glamorous.
The damage they are doing to our children is inexcusable, and I really wish more parents would speak up about it.
In college, you will learn to research, separate facts from opinions, and cite where you found your information. A year from now, it would be interesting for us to read another post from you on this subject; one with statistics showing, for one thing, the comparisons by year that another poster suggested. Keep blogging, keep growing, take some college courses online. You can fit them into your life if you really want to - you were in high school courses last spring, weren't you? Don't know where to begin? Check out the local community college and sign up for Freshman English and Writing Composition. Bet they have evening and Saturday classes. Why couldn't you go at night? This may sound harsh, but honestly Mercede, your mother's problems are not the only reason you haven't started college. Start now, you will feel good about it.
Mercede, I see you mentioned showing the pics to your father. Has the light dawned on him how wonderful a daughter he has and that his first family is in need of his help?
I dislike Alaska more and more every day. Must be something in the water that makes 90% of the people totally nuts.
Mercede, you need to get the hell out the second you can. Run, child, run.
hey kid, you got guts
i know you never asked for any of this to happen to you but it has, it's up to you now what you do with it.
for you this must seem like a bad movie.
so change the ending of it.
write your own story.. think about it... if the palins can con people with their non-stop lies...you can stop them with the truth, expose them for the people they are..
i am just one person from canada but i can tell you there are many people from all over the world who would be willing to help you
all you need to do is ask...
Mercede,
I would love to see Levi, you and your family have the opportunity to spend more time with Tripp. After reading the Vanity Fair article, it appears that Levi was indeed telling the truth about many of the things he said about Sarah Palin. I hope Levi stands up for his parental rights and gets a better custody agreement. And honestly Mercede, he would be doing Alaskans as well as all Americans a true service by telling what he knows about the Palins. If she is really as mean and spiteful as people say she is, she could damage our country terribly if she were elected president!
I have a niece who leaves in AK and she is nothing like any of the Palins. My niece has a daughter that is an "A" student who will be going on to college. I honestly wonder what do people do in Wallisa for entertainment besides having sex. Where are the parents of these kids that are getting pregnant? I come from a large family and I never would think to disappoint my parents by having a baby out of wedlock. Now don't get me wrong. My son went with a girl for a very long time and she got pregnant. But he didn't run out on her and they did marry but they weren't married a year and got divorced. My son married her because he didn't want his child being called a bastard child. Here is the problem I have with your brother. My son is just a cook he fought hard to have equal custody with his child. He does have it. He has the child five days and the mother has the child five days. Why if your brother wants his son in his life didn't fight harder for him? He needed to find a divorce lawyer not the idiot that is defending him now along with his so called body guard. Levi isn't a crook. He could find a job at McDonald's at least it shows the court he is working and willing to do any job for his son. Does Levi realize that people in the country think he is a dead beat dad? Look I like Levi and I think he is getting a raw deal. He needs to stay away from the Palins. Set up a place to exchange the child. Many couples I know meet at WalMart parking lot or McDonald parking lot. Someplace neutral. That way he doesn't have to do anything but get his child. The Palins can't do anything to him. Fight for his son. Then maybe I will have allot more respect for his fight. I wish him the best.
Okay, I've kept silent on the issue for a while, but now I'm really getting irritated.
As a teen mother (my 1st when I was 16, 2nd when I was 18, 3rd at 20 and 4th at 25), as a single mother, as a divorced adult/teen, as a divorced mother, as a mother in general, I am sick and tired of the glamorization of teen pregnancy.
How glamorous is it to be nine months pregnant, sneeze and wet yourself? How glamorous is it to have a bowel movement when you're trying to give birth? How glamorous is it to have to apply for welfare because you can't get a decent job after you've dropped out of high school? How glamorous is it to see the father of your child going to the Senior Dance with another girl?
These are the realities that teen mothers face. Not "oh, what am I going to wear on this tv show" or "how will I do my hair for that photo shoot".
The fact that she is a teen parent is moot, because she isn't like the other teens. She has a family with money that helps her (whether she admits it or not), and has a lot of money coming in from her own promotions. Fine, good for her, she's making money. It's hypocritical that she calls Levi an attention-whore, yet goes to a magazine to tell everyone about the break-up, and then go on such a lame show.
Candies would be better served by having a REAL teen mother as their spokesperson. One who has dealt with the problems most teen mothers face. Poverty, struggle, education woes, relationship problems (not public fueds fueled by media), the lack of friends and support, the stigma that will follow you and your child for years to come, etc.
The fact that many girls are purposely trying to get pregnant isn't new. It's been happening for a long time. 12 years ago when I was in high school, I know of a few that did it because their boyfriends' families had money. Unfortunately, the desire to have a child at 14-15 is nothing more than immaturity proving itself. A baby cannot show the love and affection these girls are craving. It usually makes them worse off.
Alaska needs a better sex education program, and it needs the parents to willingly talk to their children (yes, I include the males because they get off scott free until they are legal adults) about the hardships involved in raising kids, even as a stable, settled adult.
How is it that Bristol, who has three younger siblings, claims to have been so surprised to find out what it's like to raise kids?
I was the first of three kids and I started babysitting from a spookily young age. I had a brother and a special needs sister. I figured out real fast that having kids was not a gateway to good times.
But Bristol was actively trying to get pregnant and then all bug eyed about what having a baby meant? Say what?
And yes, now she seems happy to hold out her skirt and let gold fall into it, all to prove what a poor decision getting pregnant young was for her.
Along the way she tells people not to have sex, which is kinda like saying that no one should drive a car.
I mean, you might not be safe without a seat belt and that would clearly just encourage irresponsible behavior, right?
Seems to me that the most miserable thing going on in Bristol's life is being shackled to her mom. That's gotta burn like poison in the heart.
Jan...Levi only gets 50 hours a MONTH with Tripp. I personally think he agreed to that riotously unfair number because the Palins "have something", either real or imagined on him. Bristol could have offered to "let" Levi have Tripp the weekend before she left, saying "you get him for 50 hours at once and in return I get to take him to LA and not worry about your visits".
IF Levi tried to fight Bristol bringing HIS son to LA...she could petition the judge to force Levi to "agree"- by saying what an "opportunity" it is to be on DWTS.
I admit I hope Bristol will be as woodenly horrid as she was on that American Teenager show; then at least poor Tripp can be at home with his environment and routines and all the other important mainstays of a baby's life.
Mercede, steel yourself for the inevitable whining, grating nonsense which Bristol will be spewing on her DWTS rehearsal footage: "it's just so HARD being a SINGLE MOM doing everything ALONE, but I'm STRONG! Rehearsing hours a day will be nothing for me, I'm already sleep deprived because I WORK FULL TIME (at a job where nobody has ever actually seen me) and raise my baby ALONE (while receiving free child care and hundreds of thousands of dollars for magazine covers and more than 100k of donated baby loot from my mom's minions) and by the way, did I mention I am ALONE and SINGLE and it's so hard raising a baby ALONE??"
I am not diminishing what ACTUAL single mothers do...it just drives me batty that Bristol puts so much time and effort I to keeping that baby AWAY from people like Sadie and Sherry- people who not only would help with Tripp's care, they'd be truly thrilled and blessed to help with him.
A brave and absolutely needed post! The pictures say it all. Bristol is following her mother's horrifying example as a parent, and it is very sad, plain and simple. Your adorable nephew will some day know who in the family has always had his best interests first and foremost in their lives and hearts. Don't veer from the moral highground you are on.
What do you know about the info about Palin in the Vanity Fair article? The sources refuse to give their names. Why is Glenn Beck coming to see Sarah Palin Sept 11? Are they have a rally in Alaska???
In her book Palin said when the news broke about Bristol "of course I knew she was pregnant!" but up until that point in the book there was no mention about what was happening with Bristol. This seemed jarring to me, and suggested that either she was brushing it off or didn't know until right about that time. I always felt this smacked of a teenager who wasn't getting the attention she needed (didn't Todd spend a lot of work time away from the family?). Seemed like Sarah could solve the problem instantaneously by declaring the two would get married. . .without really thinking about it, as seems her style.
And Bristol has taken her mom's lessons for living full stride.
Well said! That bathroom wall is so sad. I found the hypocrisy of Bristol's DWTS gig laughable after she accused your brother of seeking fame & attention. Hang in there!
"Johnston is reviled pretty universally across the board but he's a little more popular with Democrats (15/61) than he is with Republicans (4/76) or independents (4/74)."
Oh, oh. Looks as if Bristol is off to a rocky start over at Dancing With The Stars:-
I wonder if she'll throw in the towel before her first performance.
Right on! Isn't it funny how the Palins' celebrity is based on screwup and failure?
I don't have children but my parents had me on the pill when I was 15 to avoid any unfortunate accidents. I am in my mid 40's now and am thankful that my parents were so proactive.
Many of my friends here in Alaska have their girls on birth control as well, many have the implants so they don't have to remember to take the pill everyday. Teens are going to have sex, babies don't have to be a consequence.
This is good citizen journalism,Mercede. Keep it up.
I think the "miricle" would be if these girls learned to spell.
Excellent post. Entertainment Weekly got it right when they called Bristol a "Professional Teen Mom."
She is making it cool to be a single mom - get pregnant and all these great things can happen to you. Bristol belongs on MTV's programming alongside Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant, because those shows are contributing to this acceptance that it is okay to be young and pregnant.
Not every single mom can pay for their apartment, car, electronics, etc. by going on Dancing With The Stars... She is only famous for who she is and what she did (have a baby).
I know you don't want this to be about Bristol, but you're right, she did missed an opportunity that could have been a long term career to speaking to young at risk teens.... She will have to want to do it and Not force to do it. I believe she was force and never comfortable... Everybody are not born to be a public speaker... people are trained to do that. Pushing a teenager who really don't want to live up to a life style she is force to speak on, can be horrible.
I saw the picture of her DWTS on US magazine.. She look really good, her hair is beautiful and the make up cause her to look more her age... she dancing with a little man so I hope he do drop her LOL... Kate forgot to tell her, she can't choose what you want to wear... I heard she was upset when she saw what she had to wear... DWTS had to show us the contract she signed. A lawyer should have went line by line with her... because she is young, they are dressing her half-way naked... The dress look like a knitted scarf wrap around her, very low back and short... I know it is extremely uncomfortable for her and it will make her a bigger target to the press....
Ok... no- more Bristol, I will pray for her....
I think your post need to be published in a Newspaper or magazine... It is a big problem in this country.... one of the problem is parents not being parents... 13, 14 and 15 years old are too young to be dating... This is the age parent should be preparing their daughter and son for dating... When my niece wanted to date at 15... my sister met the boy father and they came to an agreement to take tern in taking them out to dinner, movies, skating etc... They will allow them to a little space... like in the movie their parent will sit a few rows behind or in front. They teach them how to communicates with each other with out having sex... they did not date on their own till they were 16. My sister was very open about sex, and my niece understood that she can have an meanful boyfriend, girlfriend realtionship without sex.... when the boy begin pressing her about having sex, she drop him.
When i was a kid, I wasn't allow to hang out at 13, 14 and 15... my mother didn't have to worry about putting me and my younger sister on birth control... I made the discussion when I was 19 in college... we were well educated about birth control... I loved babies and want 10 of my own.. LOL I babysitted all my cousins babies, I enjoyed as a teenagers... But I had enough since to know a baby comes with a price.... Three of my college roommates got pregnant on campus and I babysitted for one of them. It is not easy, watch them drop out of school to marry the father.... two of them got divorce shortly after marriage... all were in abusive relationship... two were able to go back to school and get their degree, but went through so much he//...
Parents need to be parent and spend time with their kids and give the kids the attention the desire and set limmitations at such a young age...
Wow that is really disturbing -- I didn't start having kids until I was 30 but there were times I felt so overwhelmed. Having that responsibility at age 14, they simply have no concept and of the reality of it, you are right that Bristol is not providing any kind of insight about the reality of the situation of girls that get these kind of wishes. It's like they're children who want a toy. Very sad.
Mercedes....is Trigg really Sarah Palin's biological son?
Do you know what Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin are doing in Anchorage Sept 11?
Check out Wonkette. They said some very nice things about you and your blog.
I just read the article and watch the video of bristol on jay leno's show. When asked about levi she was just like her mother. Veiled bitch. when asked about levi's run for mayor, she laughed and said he would have to move to wasilla and then this bitchy laugh about "he'll have to get his ged" and looked like, talked like, acted like the mean school girl who gets revenge. She talked about how he just wants to wear straight jeans and wants to be a star with radar chasing him. Good grief --what does this idiot think she is doing...her verbal capability is nonsense words to fill in the blanks. "whatnot" and "dadadada" I'm sorry to be so down on this girl but she gets what she deserves. She didn't land anything on her own. Those were her mother's connections and she has not developed any skills, talent, or eduation to be a real "star", just a reality star that will eventually go away as soon as the truth about her mom comes out. I hope levi will do that. He has more support than he knows.
Oh, I totally forgot my point.....I was questioning the judge who said that any badmouthing the other parent, etc. could result in changes .....like losing time around that person who does the badmouthing.....well, bristol, on national tv....was making fun of his father.....it seems to me that something should be made of this.....Don't let any opportunity pass.
Merecede,
Could you clarify the details around the photo of you in the pink prom dress that is on Gryphen's blogpost from Sept 4?
What is the date that this photo was taken and why did Bristol not attend the prom? Where was this photo taken?
Thanks and best wishes, JJ
Levi is probably NOT the father of Tripp - but they could be closely related. My theory is Tripp is Levi's brother because Bristol was banging everybody at pill popping parties.
Hang in there Miss Sadie! Obviously Bristol wants to be an attention seeking media whore just like her mother, but you probably know the saying, the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.
Bristol is just a younger version of Kate Gosselin; Kate did the same thing with her eight kids, left them alone while she got fame and glory on DWTS. Kate Gosselin and Bristol Palin make American women look bad, you on the other hand Sadie make women look intelligent, please keep on speaking out and making your voice heard! You truly are making a difference, keep up the good fight!
I have to agree that I don't think Bristol should be on DWTS. She isn't a Star. However, to be fair, it seems to me that Levi is getting just as much of the spot light as Bristol. And all he did was have unprotected sex with his girlfriend. Why is posing for Play Girl different than being on DWTS?
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